Children & Chocolate and Other Paths to God

I remember taking a journalism class in college. They always taught us to begin with the five "W's" to get the information we needed for a story. Well, I think I have a budding journalist on my hands.

I'm convinced that when a child turns 4 a switch in her brain with a big "W" goes on. While I am happy for my daughter's growing curiosity about the world around her, it can be a little insane.

In the five minute drive to preschool this morning:

Why dey have flowers in dare yard? (Because they're pretty.)

Where dat man going? (He's off to work, like Daddy.)

What dat bird saying? (He's saying "good morning!")

When dey finish building dat house? (Soon, it looks like they're working on the inside now.)

and then... the one that really got me:

Who lives with God?  (We all do. He's all around us.)

I checked in the rear view mirror to see what kind of reaction my response got and saw her with a furrowed brow looking out the window. I realize that she may just be interested if he lives alone, since she recently asked this question about both her grandmothers who live alone. But I'm just not sure where this is heading.

"Do you mean in heaven sweetie?," I ask, thinking this is a deeper conversation then I was prepared for this early in the morning. (Summer Bible school may not be such a bad idea.)

"No, here," she answers.

"Okay," I begin, "Well, God lives with us here on Earth. He created everything you see and is with us all the time."

"Why?" she asked, "why he want to live with us?"

"Because he loves all people and wants to be with us." I reply. Then, out of curiosity, "Honey, where did this come from?"

"I dunno," she answered lightly. "Can we have popcorn after school?"

And that's the funny thing about a deep discussion with a preschooler. It's usually over before you even know what happened!

In all circumstances give thanks, for this is the will of God for you in Jesus Christ. (1 Thessalonians 5:18)

Right behind trusting God, always giving thanks is sometimes hard for me to do. It's not that anything horrible is going on, it's just that I'm feeling a little overwhelmed by life and frustrated with myself for some stupid choices I've made lately.

But the point is, in my house, the hidden Eleventh Commandment is "Thou Shalt Not Whine or Complain." Both are irritating and non-productive, especially when I hear myself doing it.

So today, when I already spent a half-hour venting to a friend this morning on the phone, I decided that I need to give myself an attitude adjustment. It's all in how we look at things, right?

- When my 4-year old is chasing the dog and taking all of the clothes out of her dresser, I give thanks that she is healthy, and recovered from last week's nasty strep throat.

- When the 1-year old is climbing up my leg and yelling at me to pick her up, I give thanks that she is learning to walk and talk, albeit LOUDLY...

- When I stress that I spent too much money last month (on parties and home decorating), I give thanks that though we need to tighten the belt a little for a while, we can still put food on the table and live very comfortably.

- When my mom-in-law calls and says something equivalent to nails on chalkboard, I will not be offended, and I will give thanks that she is such a part of my daughters' lives.

- When I stress that I've over-committed myself, I will give thanks that God has given me some useful talents, and then I will prioritize.

- When I feel trapped in my house by the rainy weather and a still recovering child, I will give thanks for my neighborhood mom friends who are my lifeline to sanity.

- When my husband comes home late from work and either misses the kids or dinner, I will give thanks that he works so hard and has a good job that he (usually) enjoys that enables me to stay home.

- When one or both children wake me in the middle in the night, I will not think they are conspiring to kill me, I will give thanks that they are in my life, and that I can comfort them. (I will give even bigger thanks if hubby is the one to get up...)

Today I give thanks that God has put me where I am at this moment, and has opened my eyes to how great life is.  I will count my blessings often, for my immediate and extended family, my old and new friends who keep me balanced, my health, my wonderful community, my children's pediatric office, and for the police officer who let me off with a warning the other day as I sped to the doctors' office with two screaming kids (because he didn't want to be responsible for making a mother go off the deep end...).

But really, I am most thankful for my God, who loves me no matter how much I whine.

My husband came home the other night to the usual 6pm chaos. I had one of the music channels on the TV, probably either "70's Favorites" or "Party Hits", as both are upbeat and fun for the kids. (Though I've got my older daughter digging the jazz and blues channels too...) The children had been fed, and were just enjoying some play time before bed. Sometimes, however, I forget how bizarre the world of child-rearing can look to those who aren't up to their eyeballs in it 14 hours a day.

The four-year-old was running around the house wearing her bathing suit, sunglasses and new flip-flops. She had been wearing clothes up until about 3pm and decided then that it was time to "suit up" for reasons I don't try to understand. Whatever. It was a beautiful day, however, and I kept trying to get her outside, but I did require that she put on some more clothing. No dice. So when my husband came home, he wanted to take her to the park behind our house, but all he got was a "No sanks daddy. I stay here." And she continued to sing her little song to herself and put bibs on all of her stuffed animals in the TV room.

Next he focused his attention on the 1-year-old, who was zipping around the dining room with the dog bowl on her head. I'm not sure if she put it there or her big sister, but she was enjoying it, and wasn't planning on slowing down for anyone. My husband laughed and surveyed the room.

"Where's Fred?" my husband asked, trying one last time to make some contact with our dependents.

"Dunno," I answered, absorbed in a cookbook at the kitchen table. I have a ton of family coming in this weekend and have been trying to plan some meals. "I don't think he's outside," I said, "check the living room."

Sure enough, amid all the chaos, Fred was sitting in the pup tent (no pun intended) that my older daughter got for her birthday. I haven't decided yet where the tent is going to reside in the house, so there it still sits. With a beagle in it.

"This place a little crazy today or is it just me?" he asked as the dish-wearing baby scooted over his feet.

"Uh, no, this is pretty much the norm," I answered, smiling. Some days I guess the house appears more "under control", but most days I feel like I live in a zoo. Yes, residing with small children and pets is definitely living on the wild side. Just call me Ranger Rick.

FYI - for those of you in the Baltimore area, Fr. Leo Patalinghug will be giving a presentation on Grace Before Meals at St. Joseph Church in Cockeysville, MD this Sunday, April 20th. Contact information is Marie Lybolt, 410.683.0600. There are two scheduled, one at 9am, the next at 10:30am, both in the multipurpose room.

St. Joseph's Church is on Church Lane off of York Road, directly across the street from Cranbrook Road (there's an IHOP on that corner). Visit http://www.stjoseph-parish.org for more information on the parish.

For more information on this break-dancing, cooking Catholic priest, visit www.gracebeforemeals.com.

So I've been gone a while. In case anyone is still checking in, I'm back :-)

Been ridiculously busy, and incredibly productive (the two are not always congruent...). In the last two weeks I've got the infamous 1970's dining room hutch transformed into something a bit more modern, I've painted the avocado green legs on the other table, and I found a free (I LOVE free...) double bed headboard on Craig's List that I also got cleaned up and painted.  I also found some fun accessories at Tuesday Morning. I hadn't been there in years, but they have oodles of decorating stuff for decent prices. And, of course, I've hit my favorite Sunday morning flea market and gotten some fun china and silver teapots for a few bucks.

I also had a birthday, if you haven't noticed that nasty little ticker under my name click over. Honestly, I try not to get too hung up on the age thing. Every now and then, however, I do get a rude reminder that I'm not 25 anymore. My hips hurt if I'm holding the baby for too long. My lower back hurts on occasion. My face and hands are starting to get those dark spots that my mother has. And don't get me started on the gray hair...but at least that's fixable. Oh well. My body might not be what it was 10 years ago, but my life couldn't be better. I wouldn't trade anything to be in my twenties again!

But the biggest thing in the last two weeks was my daughters' birthdays. They're exactly two years and 364 days apart. (it's not by accident, I got to pick my c-section) So yesterday I had a dozen 4 year olds over. I prepped and planned and prayed for nice weather. It was beautiful on Saturday, and it's gorgeous today. Yesterday it was 50 degrees and gross. Since this happens for pretty much every party I've ever had, I've gotten used to it and plan accordingly. The other moms were a huge help, and I think everything went smoothly. And I'm fairly certain my daughter had a wonderful time at her "Puppy Party". She woke up this morning and asked if we were going to do it again today...

This coming weekend my brother and his family (including the dog) are all coming to visit from New Hampshire, so after today's recovery, I'll start prepping for that event.
 
Right now, however, the 4 year old is at Grandma's and the baby is upstairs sleeping, so I may try to take this rare opportunity and catch a few zzzz's myself. Us old people need naps too :-)!