For the last year or two my four year old has had several imaginary friends (I.F.s for those in the know...). Tubby is the main guy, while TeeTee, PoPo, and Grinda only make appearances at select gatherings. I've had to hold the door open for Tubby, set a place for him at dinner, even help set up for a party in his honor. Usually, though, Tubby is cared for by my daughter.

She's drawn pictures of him on the blackboard in our kitchen and he's bigger than I thought. He's slightly taller than my daughter, and sadly, has no body to speak of. He's just a head on two legs, with two arms sticking out where his ears should be. He does have a nice smile though.

I'm sure kids develop IFs for a variety of reasons, though I'm thinking they may be hereditary. According to both our mothers, my husband and I each had our IFs when we were little too. (though I have zero recollection of this)

Sometimes Tubby is around to just "keep company" as my daughter likes to say. Other times, I see her use him to work out social stresses (such as they are for a 3 or 4 year old). There was the time I was in the kitchen and heard her yell at Tubby to get back in line and wait his turn for the bathroom, sounding very frustrated. I remember thinking, you know you're having a bad day when your I.F. is pissing you off! (I'm hoping that she wasn't mimicking her nursery school teacher...)

Whatever the reason, he's been around our house for so long now that I can tell when she's with him. She gets very "busy" and you'll hear her talking under her breath. I'm glad she has him. He's been good to her.

I think things changed yesterday morning, however.

Upon my daughter's request, my husband helped set up a birthday party for Tubby in our basement. The whole gang was there, and all the food was ready. But, alas, Tubby never showed up. My daughter told us that he "growed up and moved away" and that's why he didn't come.

Hmmm. Well, I'm curious to see if he's gone for good or just on vacation. You just never know with these I.F.s. Where ever he is, I hope he's having a good time...

1. You have at least one relative who wore a black dress every day for an entire year after a funeral.

2 You spent your entire childhood thinking that what you ate for lunch was pronounced 'sangwich.'

3. Your family dog understood Italian.

4. Every Sunday afternoon of your childhood was spent visiting your grandparents and extended family.

5. You've experienced the phenomena of 150 people fitting into 50 square feet of yard during a family cookout.

6. You were surprised to discover the FDA recommends you eat three meals a day, not seven.

7. You ate pasta for dinner at least three times a week and every Sunday.

8. You grew up thinking no fruit or vegetable had a fixed price and that the price of everything was negotiable through haggling.

9. You watched Lawerence Welk and Ed Sullivan every Sunday night.

10. You were as tall as your grandmother by the age of seven.

11. You thought everyone's last name ended in a vowel.

12. You thought nylons were supposed to be rolled down to the ankles.

13. You were surprised to find out that wine was actually sold in stores.

14. You never ate meat on Christmas Eve or any Friday for that matter.

15. You ate your salad after the main course.

16. You thought Catholic was the only religion in the world.

17. You were beaten at least once with a wooden spoon.

18. You thought every meal had to be eaten with a hunk of bread in your left hand.

19. You learned to play bocce before you went to school.

20. You can understand Italian but you can't speak it.

21. You have at least one relative who came over on the boat.

22. You grew up calling the bathroom the baccausa. And you had only one.

23. You were surprised to learn most kitchen utensils had another name which didn't end in a vowel.

24. All your uncles fought in a World War.

25. You have at least six relatives named Tony, Jack or Dominic. (or in my case, Joseph or Pete)

26. You have relatives who aren't really your relatives.

27. You have relatives you don't speak to.

28. You drank wine before you were a teenager.

29, You relate on some level, admit it, to the Godfather and the Sopranos.

30. You grew up in a house with a yard that didn't have one patch of dirt that didn't have a flower or vegetable growing out of it.

31. Your grandmother's furniture was as comfortable as sitting on plastic. Wait. You were sitting on plastic.

32. You thought that talking loud was normal.

33. You thought that cookie cakes and the Tatantella were common at all weddings.

34. You thought everyone got pinched on the cheeks and money stuffed in their pockets by relatives.

35. Your mother is overly protective of males in the family, no matter what their age.

36. Every lunch meat you ate ended in a vowel.

37. There was a crucifix in every room of the house, including the cellar.

38. There was a saint in a bathtub in the yard.

39. Boys didn't do house work because it was women's work.

40. You couldn't date a boy without getting approval from your father.

41. You know what lemon ice is.

42. You called macaroni "pasta."

43. You have one irrational fear or phobia which can be attributed to your mother.

I wonder what would happen if we treated our Bible like we treat our cell phone?

What if we carried it around in our purse or pockets?

What if we flipped through it several times a day?

What if we turned back to go get it if we forgot it?

What if we used it to receive messages from the text?

What if we gave it to kids as gifts?

What if we used it when we traveled?

What if we used it in case of emergency?

This is something to make you go...hmmm...where is my Bible? Oh, and one more thing. Unlike our cell phone, we don‟t have to worry about out Bible being disconnected because Jesus already paid the bill. Makes you stop and think "where are my priorities?‟ And no dropped calls!

Dog Plucks Boy From Platte